As an avowed and unabashed fan of butter, I can tell you I’ve spent an embarrassing amount of money throughout my life on the milky stuff. But I’ve never considered it to be such a habit that I thought of stealing two truck-fulls.
I guess a quartet of thieves in Trenton, Ontario just liked the stuff more than me and decided to spend Christmas day stealing a total of approximately 40,000 kg (88,185 lbs) of butter from a facility there. That’s a lot of butter.
The location was actually a trucking facility and, the Quinte West Detachment of the Ontario Provincial Police say that the thieves stole two trailers full of butter. If you think that maybe those were simply the trailers nearest the gate, think again.
Please call the OPP immediately if you are approached by someone who says, “Psst…ya wanna buy some butter? I got unsalted!” https://t.co/USg08bbdkt
— Susan of the Boostertons (@Sues_Reality) December 30, 2021
Canada’s CTV reports that the trailers were found on December 27 emptied of their contents. Police estimate that the pure, uncut white stuff has a street value of $200,000 CAD ($158,234 USD at current exchange rates).
The Ontario Provincial Police is asking anyone with information about the crime to reach out and help out. They have said the thieves were dropped off near the facility by someone driving a black SUV, which is… helpful. Based on photos shared by the OPP, it looks a bit like a Cadillac Escalade, which just makes the whole thing weirder somehow.
Unfortunately, for the residents of Trenton, 2021 will always be remembered as the year of the great butter burglary. Weirdly, Canadians do seem to have a fondness for food-based pilfering. Between 2011 and 2012, thieves stole roughly 3,000 tonnes of maple syrup in Quebec. Criminals just need to rob a mill and chicken farm before they can get together for the world’s biggest (and cheapest) pancake party.
SAUTÉE AWAY: Major baste in the butter belt on Boxing Day. OPP hoping to churn up tips. https://t.co/JvJOHGC61u
— CBC Ottawa Traffic (@cbcotttraffic) December 29, 2021